Alistair profile on chattube

Like Lithuanian goddess Agnieska, here, who swept into Made In Chelsea like a 5ft 6, 32D fork of Eastern European lightning to install herself as an i ntern for Francis Bou 1 le - he's 4 as ► the chinless hooray with the glasses. A World Mags World Mags Every so often the British car industry throws up a shock, and this could be the biggest since Mc Laren's F1 supercar back in 1992.

The Jaguar C-X75 - an all- electric, four-wheel drive, 780bhp concept - was shown at last year's Paris Motor Show but Jaguar has confirmed it is building this car, albeit with a few tweaks. " ASTON VILLA VS WIG AN Villa Park, Saturday 7 May, 3.34pm The Villa forward picks up a booking for his complaints. Unlike Vodafone, T-Mobile, Orange and 02, we're now offering all-you-can-eat data on Pay As You Go. IL IL Kate Upton IL We're getting a tad obsessed with the buxom Victoria's Secret model, so we'll stick her in every week we receive a nice snap.

Yes, if he asked me to, but to be honest I'd rather be in a movie by my wife! I've actually written three new comics and I've put him on the very last page of one of them. And finally, have you had any offers to do American talk shows like Piers Morgan?

Do you still knock about with Russell Brand now he's gone all big-time? He's a villainous character who turns up on the last page! I get offers from the US quite regularly, but my life is here.

A blue dot means you'll be taken to i a concentration camp.

Get a red dot, though, and you'll be shot in the head, at once.

If you could have mutant superhero skills, what anima would you be morphed with? Your missus, Jane Goldman, is also insanely talented as a screenwriter (she wrote Kick Ass). I've had a few propositions, which is remarkable, given my age.

If all of the above sounds like the rantings of madmen, well, that's not too far from the truth.

I hate killing them off because you know they're going to bring them back. BEST MATE What would you rather have - the very first Wii 2 or the first ever Spider-Man comic?

Even with the death of Spider-Man, you know they're not going to kill him off. I've got a huge collection that covers most of the back World Mags wall in my office. Well, I've already got the first Spider- Man comic, so make that the Wii 2, thank you very much! Would you like to take this opportunity to say something nice about them?

Jaguar has said there'll be a limited-edition of 250 cars, with fewer than 50 using the gas turbine technology. I Keeping things on an F1 theme, with all cars on the grid using tuned four- cylinder, 1.6-litre engines by 2013, Jaguar intends to fit a Cosworth engine that should kick out 500bhp! " i r mm If you hadn't rowed about it wouldn't have booked you! ■l Michael Dawson: "I was pushed in the back, ref ! " SPURS VS BLACKPOOL White Hart Lane, Saturday 7 May, 4.33pm The Spurs man lays into the ref after conceding a penalty. And drive round in high speed- bump areas, just to make sure! So fair play to the Come director who added this pinch of "va-va-voom" to the show! 9 ~ Queen i *s£K* betomes 1 *e »«S**1 becaus e i monarch wet, I Ae's mil* „ Pictures for the stronger stomach!

With electric motors stii driving all four wheels, the Cosworth 1.6 (made in Northamptonshire) will most ikely assist the power when required. STOKE VS ARSENAL Britannia Stadium, Sunday 8 May, 3.32pm Jermaine Pennant gets into bother after a clash with Jack Wilshere. " f BIRMINGHAM VS WOLVES St Andrews, Sunday 8 May, 12.30pm The Wolves duo aren't happy Craig Gardner was sent off. The sexy 90210 star (right) is extending her range with Blood Out, playing a bondage- enthusiast, leather-wearing, lady-snogging lesbian. Je Lownd The 90210 star's shocked the whole of the UK (well, the Nuts office bit of it) by dating Soccer AM host Max Rushden. Send your injuries to [email protected] acid mix-up causes mitt to melt! " m assuming it's because he would have looked like Kim Kardashian's genitals before she's shaved 'em! Boffins in South Korea have invented a phone battery that can be charged by the sound of someone's voice. I want to say congratulations to Sir Paul Mc Cartney on getting engaged for the third time.

Unfortunately, the people in question are committed, organised and have a lot of weaponry at their disposal.

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Alistair profile on chattube introduction

Alistair profile on chattube

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